Sexuality refers to someone’s preferences and habits regarding desire and sexual activity. As unique as a human being is, so unique is its sexuality. Everyone of us has a different combination of sexual activities, desires, thoughts, fantasies, beliefs, attitudes, values, behaviours, practices, roles and relationships. The physical, spiritual and emotional aspects of sexuality include feelings of love, affection, trust and caring. How sexuality develops is still a big mystery, but it is of significant importance when you are searching for a partner.
Finding the perfect match in bed can be challenging: sometimes it requires a lot of patience and effort, and sometimes physical or emotional problems get in the way. Think of anxiety about sex, lack of sexual desire, body-image issues or impotence, delayed ejaculation or orgasmic disorders. Others might have fantasies that might be considered too extreme according to others. Think of BDSM, threesomes or perhaps having a shoe fetish.
Despite the chance that you and your partner may encounter differences in sexuality, with proper guidance, counseling or just psycho-education many of these differences can be tackled. For the differences that are difficult to tackle acceptance towards these differences can be developed. Please note that your partner’s sexuality cannot be changed, but people may adjust it or become more open minded.
Here is a list of sexual disorders, preferences and issues. Although the DSM-IV considers the listed sexual preferences as sexual disorders, I have given them a different label, since for some their sexual preference is a lifestyle and not a disorder at all.